One Step Too Far

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Japanese Anemone one of my favorites (photo by Shutterstock)

I stepped into the middle of my Japanese anemones the other day, intending to cut off blossoms and stems past their prime. I had cut a few stems when I took one step closer to the center of the spent blooms and was immediately surrounded by an angry buzzing horde of black and yellow striped demons.

I ran, of course, but they flew faster. I felt a sting on my shoulder and another on my arm. I ran some more. One or two stings wasn’t good enough for them. They kept coming. I flew across the front yard screaming, unashamed of humiliating myself in my own yard, swatting myself all over.  I felt another sharp pain in my shoulder, then another, then a pain on my hand. 
They were relentless!
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Shutterstock

I screamed some more and shook my left hand as a Yellow-jacket clung tightly to the space between thumb and fingers. Shaking him off was impossible with that business end so deeply imbedded.

The neighbors weren’t outside. If they had been, they would have heard me uncensored.

“No, get off of me you monster!” I screamed.

I’ll be honest. I never used the word ‘monster’ that day. Instead, it was a word that burned the end of my tongue when it flew out of my mouth, a word I don’t recall ever using before. I’m not proud of myself; but please, judge me when you have a dozen yellow-jackets riding and stinging you all at once.

At the same time, more ‘monsters’ had formed a buzzing cloud around me as I pumped my legs and prayed they wouldn’t follow me into the house. 
Yes, I was also praying.

Finally, I brushed the Yellow-jacket from my hand and ran for the door.

A split second of relief hit me as I closed the door behind myself and stood in the kitchen.

Then I felt a sharp pain in my right shoulder again, and another on my left upper arm. A yellow-jacket flew off my right arm for a second then settled back down to deliver more punishment.

Teddy had been watching me through the front window as I screamed and flailed across the yard. Now that I was in the house, still screaming, the little dog looked confused and worried. He quickly decided there was nothing he could do. Much later, I had to coax him out from under the bed . I don’t blame him. Not even Lassie could have helped.

It turns out that when I’m desperate, my mind can work fast.
I ran into the laundry room and slammed the door to confine the little demons. Yellowjackets still clung to my shirt. I closed my eyes and held my breath as I pulled the shirt over my head and past my face and hair. Then I threw that shirt in the washer and slammed the lid down.
Now the tables were turned and I was feeling murderous. I turned the water setting to hot. 
I let that machine run for a full cycle.
An hour or two later, I felt a little braver and cautiously opened the machine. Carefully, I  lifted and shook the shirt. Dead Yellowjackets littered the bottom of the washer.
Benadryl and ibuprofen helped with the eight or ten stings I had. My left hand swelled to the size of a baseball mitt. I also visited the doctor for one dose of steroids to help the swelling.

This unusually warm and sunny fall weather has kept the Yellowjackets active so far, but the nest should die soon. It’s in a spot that endangers only me, the family gardener. 

Yellowjackets aren’t active when it’s cold, and the early mornings are very chilly lately. If the cold doesn’t get them soon, I have a plan.

6 thoughts on “One Step Too Far

  1. Ahh that has my heart racing and my skin crawling! I’m so glad you didn’t have an allergic reaction

  2. Horrible! Really. As in horror! I’m glad you had the prensence of mind to take care of the problem.

  3. I am so sorry that happened to you. It is really hard to love all of nature. Coyotes and yellow jackets are my worst enemies. And yet they have a right to be on this earth too. Just somewhere else.

  4. Now you have all of us wondering what words you were using? OK, you need not respond as all of us have probably used them ourselves at some very difficult time.

    1. You’ll never get it out of me again, Bruce – unless I’m attacked by yellowjackets again! 😉

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